Is it just me; or does everyone have “that” friend? You know, the friend who will tell you only what you want to hear. It is easy to seek out this kind of friend. They will stroke your ego, and make you feel better about yourself. They do not confront you on your sin, or tell you when you are making unwise decisions. Instead, their quest for friendship is stronger than their desire for your best. Truth spoken in love is more beneficial than flattery spoken in a lie. Maybe you don’t struggle with flattery. Perhaps you have the opposite issue. When your close friends try to encourage you, do you listen; or do you just tell yourself that they are being too kind? Do you ignore compliments and encouragement? Whether you love to hear flattery, or you struggle with low self-esteem, either side shows up the sin of pride. So often in my mind, I hear compliments whispered and criticisms shouted. I want to believe something differently about myself than what God says. Perhaps, like me, you catch yourself dwelling on the negative voices. The sad thing is that our flesh truly does not want to believe the promises in God’s Word. I plead with you to listen to truth. Pride will destroy you, Proverbs 16:18. Flattery is but a net for your feet, Proverbs 29:5. You are His child, Romans 8:17. You are forgiven, 1 John 1:9. Sanctification is a process, 2 Corinthians 3:18. Jesus chose death to provide you life, Romans 5:10. Jesus came to bring abundant life, John 10:10. Under Christ’s blood, you are free from condemnation, Romans 8:1. God’s Word provides instruction, rebuke, healing, hope, direction, worth, and redemption. You cannot listen to all of the voices around you. The world will bombard you with statements about yourself. They will tell you if you are pretty, financially stable, fashionable, healthy, worthy of love, a good parent, or even a good person in general. You must seek truth. The truth is that God knows you intimately, and He still loves you. God is not finished with you, yet. When you listen to the lies and the negative voices, you need to hit a reset button. A great verse to help with that is Philippians 4:8, “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.” Do you listen to the flatterer? Do you listen to the critical person? With what kind of voices do you surround yourself? Do you listen to godly, spiritual influences? Are you seeking and listening to truth? Who has the loudest voice in your ear? About Shelly![]() Growing up with a strong Christian family, Shelly has had the privilege of having many godly, influential people in her life. Besides going to college in Indiana and teaching school for 1 year in Texas, she has lived in Minnesota her whole life. Recently, she moved to Colorado after meeting her husband on E-Harmony. She is extremely humbled by how the Almighty God works in our lives in such personal ways. Shelly is now a missionary to college students. She is thrilled with the opportunity to share the gospel with college students, to help them grow in their faith, and to encourage them to be sold out servants for God. She enjoys coffee, books, volleyball, bike rides, movies, long walks, and playing games. Want to read more from this contributor? Put her name in the search box at the top.
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I’m opinionated.
I’m a woman and I believe God built opinions into our design. I think it’s because, we’re the researchers. We devour books and research ideas on structuring the home, ways to organize our lives to make days run smoother…Hello Pintrest! The whole concept of Pintrest is alluring mostly to whom? Women! We are the family investigators. We run our investigations and we’ve found the best ways to operate our lives. This character attribute has caused us to develop a lot of opinions. Opinions God’s way, to protect ourselves and our family, etc. are healthy and good; however if they are not kept under submission to God they lead us into bondage. For anyone that knows me in "real" life it usually surprises them to learn I am an introvert. Contrary to popular belief I am not shy or stand-offish. I really like people!
I just don't get all my energy from them. That is the psychological definition of an introvert or extrovert; whether someone is energized by being alone or by time with people. My personality and yours are both designed to fully and completely glorify God. When Jesus told us to go and make disciples of all nations (Matt 28:19) I know that God had intended that we use our distinguishing personality traits to glorify Him and further his Kingdom! But does it ever seem like sometimes introverts get a bit of a bad rap? Comparing yourself to others is dangerous. Here’s why.
Paul says in 2 Cor. 10:12 that when you play the comparison game you are guilty of pride. “For we dare not class ourselves or compare ourselves with those who commend themselves. But they, measuring themselves by themselves, and comparing themselves among themselves, are not wise.” 2 Cor. 10:12 You’re probably thinking, “Pride? But when I compare myself and find myself lacking, I don’t feel boastful at all – I feel depressed!” It happens to me all the time. Like when I see: * another writer’s blog, e-book, or article get picked up * another family’s well-behaved and well-spoken kids * another mother’s pin-worthy outfit or well-styled hair But here’s the tricky condition of our hearts: pride is born in the act of comparison not in the result. {Tweet this} "I just don't like hanging out with them," she said.
The conversation was loud enough that I could hear it, even though it was coming from my husband's phone. "Just hang it up, " I pleaded, "it's a pocket dial." He was glued to the phone, looking as if he had just been slapped across the face. More phrases came over the line, "...just really gets on my nerves...not who I thought she was." This was a conversation we were never meant to hear. Words shared between two friends about me and my husband. The Eternal your God is standing right here among you, “You are the ugly twin.”
No one ever said it. They didn’t have to. I KNEW it to be true. Somewhere between farm girls with easy-to-manage short haircuts and our senior year of high school my twin had morphed into the beautiful homecoming queen. I wish I handled trials with more grace. I wish I could run the race without breaking a sweat. I wish I was the girl able to hold the weight of the world on her shoulders living in full surrender with a smile on my face and a “Bring it at me” attitude.
Even though I may at times appear that way the truth is: I get frazzled, exhausted from trying to juggle all of life’s juggling pins without letting one fall to the ground. There are days I am begging for more grace to handle this load (ehm…like today). Days I feel that all the pins are falling, a complete failure, I might as well quitter, I’m weak – I’m incapable of being who God wants me to be. The call God has placed on my life – I’m not worthy of it, I can’t do it. A lot of times I know exactly who I am. I am a wife. I am a student. I am a young adult. I am unemployed. I am an intern. I am all of these things, but the sad thing is I never grasp that all of this means nothing. Who I am should not and cannot be defined by this. The only thing that means anything is that I am and always will be a child of God.
Photo source: PostSecret.com I've noticed a trend lately. It's all over the place: pop music lyrics, Christian blogs, commercials, countless times on Pinterest.
It goes a little something like this: You are amazing. You are perfectly imperfect. You are enough. It's a mantra often touted by teenagers & those who don't quite fit in. It's also seeped over into the feminine world, as a banner of self-love, self-acceptance, and self-sufficiency. "A new analysis of the American Freshman Survey, which has accumulated data for the past 47 years from 9 million young adults, reveals that college students are more likely than ever to call themselves gifted and driven to succeed, even though their test scores and time spent studying are decreasing." We are raising a generation of deluded narcissists by Dr. Keith Albow
Psychologist Jean Twenge, the lead author of the analysis, is also the author of a study showing that the tendency toward narcissism in students is up 30 percent in the last thirty-odd years. |
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